This taken from the official Rangers site (which is as inclusive as their heritage, given that you have to register in order to view their ‘news’). Many Bothan spies died bringing you this information so use it wisely!
Mon the Hoops Orc translation included in the brackets for those non-humanly challenged!
Soccer 7’s at Murray Park
Don’t miss out on the inaugural Ranger’s Soccer 7’s tournament takingplace at Murray Park on Saturday the 26May 2007. (C’Mon the Pars)
Almost all of the places have been taken and with just a few remaining there is not much time to register your team. (Given that this is the first time it has been advertised how can anyone have already taken his or her place? I definitely smell Rafael)!
Don’t miss the chance to play at the club’s magnificent training complex
You and 6 Friends will get the chance to play at our state of the art training facilities in this fantastic football tournament. Every team will receive: Team Kit (Last seasons kit, not the new one) Team Photograph, Goody Bags (More out of date merchandise), and post tournament refreshments in the professional dining room! (I.e. you get to drain the dregs out of Wee Bazza’s Buckie bottles prior to getting charged a fortune for a Capri Sun and a ‘Aye Ready’ burger)
Plus there will also be a chance to pick up tips from former Rangers players. (Insert own joke here)
The triumphant teams that reach the final will play their match on the hallowed (Haunted) turf at Ibrox prior to a home game next season and enjoy matchday hospitality (get passes into the lounge and get fleeced for drinks)
Teams cost £995 + VAT (£1165!!) and as with all official Rangers Events (apart from the share issue) demand is likely to be high (likely to be high? Only 3 paragraphs ago we were being told that there were only a few places left! Lying Barstewards!)to avoid disappointment (cant think of any Rangers fan that avoided disappointment this season) please contact the sales team on 0870 10 10 10 ……
Please note that this article nearly broke the spell checker on my machine, such were the grammatical errors evident from the original article!
Yours in Celtic
Clydebuilt